Okay, something a little different today I think. I recently found some old oil paintings I did back in 2000 that I worked on during a huge transition in my life. It was a pivotal moment when I finally came out of the closet and began to feel the need to experiment and express myself at the same time. I had been given a present from my grandparents, an old Chines paint box complete with the 4 treasures as they are called. Artists from China used to paint and manufacture calligraphy using the inkstone, inkstick, brush and paper. 
I have to admit I have enjoyed using these techniques. The ease of creating a figure or a landscape using very simplistic brush strokes creates feelings of serenity as you follow the rule of Chines minimalism. Only, I found it very difficult to follow the technique. My Western mind could not adjust to it. Too complex. Too cluttered. I wanted to draw with too much detail, using too many brush stokes, which is the antithesis to Chines ink drawing. I bought books on the subject. One in particular entitled, The Practical Art of Chines Brush Painting by Pauline Cherrett, was a wonderfully illustrated book on how to follow this simple rule. My mind conjured images of birds perched on twigs, colourful Coy Carp swimming in a lake, even landscapes where pagodas met the setting sun before a mountainous range. All scarcely detailed with sparing strokes of the artist's brush. I opened the box and instantly went about creating my own Chines drawings.
Maybe not as minimal as I would have liked. As you can see, far too much detail was put into the effort. And for one thing, i couldn't quite get away from the cartoon style of drawing which I was more accustomed to. But I tried. And yet it was another challenge that I gave up on very quickly. I still have the inks and the box to this day. Who knows, maybe one day I'll try it again. 
Another thing I tried back in 2004 was oil painting. I would buy stretched canvases from the Works on the high street. I also had an easel and all the kit. The idea was, since I had left home and had moved into a flat with a best friend and my partner, was to spend that summer painting out in the back yard with Mike, who was my friend at the time. I hadn't long come out as gay and I was eager to try 
the type of homoerotic art that, at the time, I found rather interesting. I'd bought a book in a shop in Nottingham entitled, The Boy by Germaine Greer. The book was filled with photos and paintings depicting the beauty of the male form and on the front sleeve was the image of Bjorn Andresen that had been photographed by David Bailey, dated 1970. I recognised the boy modelled on the dust jacket because I recall that one of Mike's favourite films was one that starred Bjorn entitled, Death in Venice. I just had to buy the book.
I started to paint my own pictures using images of certain models that I found quite enticing and erotic. The painting you see above, left, with the peacock, I drew using Josh Eliot from Bel Ami studios as a model. The one to the left I drew inspiration from a cover of one of Ann Rice's novels. Still, I couldn't escape the all over cartoon themed art that I wished at the time I could just cast off. But it was all just so much play. And like the Chines ink drawings, it wasn't something that I took too seriously. And it felt good because I felt that I was no longer keeping anything secret, and that I was no longer holding anything back either creatively or passionately. 
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